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fuck this house
2:44 pm on 08.10.2003

I never knew what it would feel like for my parents to really hate me until last night. Well, I mean my dad hasn't been talking to me for over a month now, mainly because I basically told him I didn't like his jokes. So last night my mom asks me the dumbest question.
*pokes tattoo*
"Is that thing real??"
My response of course is pissy because she's seen it there for over a month now, so I just say.
"What?...You've seen it there for weeks now, what do you think."
And I know she was totally just saying that to bring up the fact I got a tattoo. Beating around the bush instead of getting straight to it. So then, less than five mins later my dad comes down and totally yells at me, saying my mom was about ready to kick my ass out of the house, or something. Tells me I can never talk to her again. Tells me I'm hopeless or annoying or something, agrees with me when I say I'm a total bitch. Nothing new. Then I was like, "Is this about my tattoo or is this about how you say I treated mom??"
Yes, this is about your tattoo."
Got into this whole thing about how I'm stuck with it for life (as if I don't know this already), thinks it was an impulse thing-on the spot, what if your next bf doesn't like you cause of it...blah blah blah. I was so fucking annoyed by that point I didn't want to hear it anymore. So now both my parents hate me over a stupid tattoo. How lame. Can't just accept who I am and the descision I've made (which I had been thinking about for over a year before I got it. Ya know, I love my parents, but sometimes I just want to be left alone, and most of the time I feel like they don't understand me and never will. Because now, I wont let them. I give up and they win, but what's new. I fight for what makes me feel bad, what makes me depressed, what makes me happy, and they kick it down each time with a come-back, or the best...the cold shoulder and disowning me as their daughter.
Lame....lame lame lame!

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